…as experienced in Surry Quays shopping hell/mall/soul-sucking habitat of the greater spotted teen sales donk…
“Welcome to Currys Digital. Can I help?”
“Yes, I’m looking for some ear/headphones with a built in mic for a phone…”
“Oh, er… well…um… ah… er…. I don’ fink we do ’em…. ‘ll jus go ars my manager….”
Ten minutes pass (by which time I have looked through all available and found one set at cost of £45)…
“Er… yeah…er my manager don fink we do em… er you wanna try a wotsit shop…er a..”
“A phone shop?”
“Yeah, that’s it…er…”
As leaving… “Er we do have these….”
“No darling, they’re speakers…”
Stand in Phones 4 U for five minutes looking at earphones and accessories (none of which are priced)…
Ignored by suited wanker chatting up girls and another stuffing crisps in face with expression of surprised newt…
Walk out just that little bit sadder…
Onto Carphone Warehouse (with grave misgivings considering previous experience)
No pissing about, walk straight to counter… “I’m looking for Earphones with a built in mic, compatible with an iPhone.”
“Oh, yeah right…” pulls off three types with prices starting at £30 and raising swiftly… then while I stand poleaxed at what they assume I’m going to pay for a bit of wire and a couple of miniature cones wanders off… returns two minutes later with “Official iPhone product” £69.
With a raised eyebrow and a low growl I indicate that this gentleman should perhaps be looking towards the other end of the market…
“Of course, we do have these for £12.95…”
“Yeah, they look alright… they’re only for the commute after all… Do you have them in black?”
“Er no, they only come in White or bright pink”
I will admit I was tempted by the pink but… no… another raised eyebrow… “How about those ones?”
“Er what ones?” Turns to look at wall of accessories with blank look of small boy in women’s lingerie department…
“Those there, for £9.99? The ones that say in big letters across the front ‘In-Earphones with Microphone’?”
After several moments of head bobbing and hand reaching, turns to me with the return of the blank look, with added shrug of incomprehension….
“There, right next to your right ear….”
“Oh, yeah… erm, they’re £9.99”
“Yes, I know. I’ll take them.”
“Do you want insur…?
“No, just the earphones please. Thank you.”
Places product in ridiculously over-sized bag (ignoring request not to) waits two minutes for receipt to print… hunts for stapler… staples receipts… snarls, walks away.
“And thank you too.”
Ten minutes later find exact same style in Tesco’s for same price but without the hassle…